Saturday, May 07, 2005
So many roads out of the suburbs...
and none of them are fast enough.
You ever think about the last time you will ever visit a familiar place? Like I haven't got a haircut in over a month because I swore that the last time I went into my local Pro Cuts I would never show my face in there again. (I know how easy it is to find another place to get a haircut, but it's the principle. Also I'm holding out on doing so until I figure out my plans the summer). Still my Mom moved out of the house I grew up in a little over a year ago, so I have no reason to ever return to ths suburbs where I grew up except for the occiasional visit to a friends house (mainly Sarah's). As was the case again tonight after a late dinner in Ft. Worth. As I was driving away I was trying to plan how the quickest way to get back to Denton, and unlike hundreds of times before, I couldn't make up my mind which way to go tonight; so that was what did it.
As I was leaving I got the feeling that tonight was the night. Perhaps it was the last time I will ever set tire in the suburb of Hurst, TX for a very, very long time. Finally.
On a subnote I think maybe five people read this thing. And ususlly two of them comment, myself included in that number. I don't care if one person of fifty read it, but regardless I am going to soon send out a bulk e-mail to many people I know letting them in on our little secret. Sorry for my avid fans thus far, but I feel it's time to let more people into the circle of trust. Or something like that.
Man have you seen the lineup for the Austin City Limit Festival? I think I am going to have to scrounge up some money for a ticket. Hey I'm leaving the country for two years...I might as well attend something sweet like that. Coldplay...Oasis...Lyle Lovett...ahhhhhhhhhhhhh yeah. ¶ 5/07/2005 01:38:00 AM
You ever think about the last time you will ever visit a familiar place? Like I haven't got a haircut in over a month because I swore that the last time I went into my local Pro Cuts I would never show my face in there again. (I know how easy it is to find another place to get a haircut, but it's the principle. Also I'm holding out on doing so until I figure out my plans the summer). Still my Mom moved out of the house I grew up in a little over a year ago, so I have no reason to ever return to ths suburbs where I grew up except for the occiasional visit to a friends house (mainly Sarah's). As was the case again tonight after a late dinner in Ft. Worth. As I was driving away I was trying to plan how the quickest way to get back to Denton, and unlike hundreds of times before, I couldn't make up my mind which way to go tonight; so that was what did it.
As I was leaving I got the feeling that tonight was the night. Perhaps it was the last time I will ever set tire in the suburb of Hurst, TX for a very, very long time. Finally.
On a subnote I think maybe five people read this thing. And ususlly two of them comment, myself included in that number. I don't care if one person of fifty read it, but regardless I am going to soon send out a bulk e-mail to many people I know letting them in on our little secret. Sorry for my avid fans thus far, but I feel it's time to let more people into the circle of trust. Or something like that.
Man have you seen the lineup for the Austin City Limit Festival? I think I am going to have to scrounge up some money for a ticket. Hey I'm leaving the country for two years...I might as well attend something sweet like that. Coldplay...Oasis...Lyle Lovett...ahhhhhhhhhhhhh yeah. ¶ 5/07/2005 01:38:00 AM
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Well, Josh, I hope last night was not the last time you visit Hurst. I think about all of the places that I have been and that I have left, and while I do miss them, I am so glad that this is where I have ended up (so far). However, when I think back five or ten years, this is definitely not where I thought I'd begin my career. I figured I'd be living in New York with a guy, starting my (hopefully) short climb up the corporate ladder. Instead, I am in a position with out much room for growth, at a company based out of Richardson, Texas getting paid crap. I've always thought I would make more of myself. It's tough growing up. Because you are the only one responsible for the direction of your life. You can no longer blame your parents. It occured to me the other day that people that have a dream-people that really want something-will stop at nothing to get it. So, having said that, why, when I know what I want, don't I go get it? Quite frankly, it's because I am afraid of leaving this life behind. This comfortable, settled life. But then I have to ask myself which life I want - the one where my passions are realized, or the one that I have known for 23 years? It's tough.
# posted by 
: 12:57 AM
: 12:57 AM
I've found lately that looking back is often much more frightening than looking forward. Comfort is easy, it's pretty nice too. You just have to decide how nice it is to you, and how much will you allow it to be a part of your life. We all have different definitions of comfort: right now for me personally it's not settling down. If I knew my actions for the next year I would be going crazy. I have no clue what I will be doing in three weeks, or where I'll be living 3,6,9 months from now. And I've never been more excited. Scared, sure, but I got faith that assures me through that. And what a difference it makes.
But advice I've had to learn in the past year or so: nothing happens without you making the first step. So whatever you want, whenever you want it, you are the instigator. Other forces will intervene, but you have to open yourself up to it. What happenes next is all up to the Force...however you define it.
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But advice I've had to learn in the past year or so: nothing happens without you making the first step. So whatever you want, whenever you want it, you are the instigator. Other forces will intervene, but you have to open yourself up to it. What happenes next is all up to the Force...however you define it.
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