Chapter 25
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Thi$ American life
I found out today that I get 3 paychecks this month. Such great news provided a temporary elation. I was afraid that since rent is due on Saturday I'd have to survive the next few weeks on about 80 bucks. But that doesn't seem the case now, which is nice.
AmeriCorps pays me every two weeks. On those paychecks I get $397.31. So my monthly income is $794.62. Take out ten percent for tithes and $450 for rent, x for bills and $35 for auto insurrance, and I can still usually manage to surive. I have about 700 on credit cards, which I am slowly tackling. I'm not the best steward of my money, but God has blessed me in so many ways this year and I have managed to survive overall just fine. I'm not complaining anyways, and I have no reason to. I haven't even had to ask the parents for any support! That's a HUGE plus! (Sure, maybe I've dropped a belt size or so, but my doc says I'm still healthy!). I never grow hungry, and I never go cold. Period.
But things do seem to be sloping downwards. My power chord on the ol' laptop is about at it's end, so I guess I need to invest in a replacement. I could go without it, but the computer is about 3 yrs old now and so bogged down with programs that bthe battery doesn't last too long anymore. But not a major issue. THE major issue is my car, which is on its last legs I'm afraid. Under my ownership at least. She needs some major repairs, and I'm just tired of paying for them. I'm ready to set her free and invest in something new. New to me, anyways.
I have a little money saved up, but not enough to get a new car. Just a couple grand. I still don't know about the job next year; I'm pretty sure i's going to happen but the waiting is getting to be a little tough. Especially as time seems to be flying by; the days are getting shorter and so is my calendar. My year with AmeriCorps is supposed to end on January 27th. If the funding doesn't come through by then I don't know what will happen. Potentially I can continue on a month-by month basis at my current position, until the funding does come through (and/or so I would have time to look elsewhere if it turns out that it won't). So at least I'd get the $794.62 continuing on and I could pay rent and bills and maybe buy some cans for dinner. I'm fine with that; the only problem is that it's not enough for a car payment also. That's why I'm hoping to find out about the job before Christmas, so that while I'm home for the holidays I can find a new car and drive back to Rhode Island. That's Plan A. Here's hoping! ¶ 11/28/2006 06:47:00 PM 1 comments
AmeriCorps pays me every two weeks. On those paychecks I get $397.31. So my monthly income is $794.62. Take out ten percent for tithes and $450 for rent, x for bills and $35 for auto insurrance, and I can still usually manage to surive. I have about 700 on credit cards, which I am slowly tackling. I'm not the best steward of my money, but God has blessed me in so many ways this year and I have managed to survive overall just fine. I'm not complaining anyways, and I have no reason to. I haven't even had to ask the parents for any support! That's a HUGE plus! (Sure, maybe I've dropped a belt size or so, but my doc says I'm still healthy!). I never grow hungry, and I never go cold. Period.
But things do seem to be sloping downwards. My power chord on the ol' laptop is about at it's end, so I guess I need to invest in a replacement. I could go without it, but the computer is about 3 yrs old now and so bogged down with programs that bthe battery doesn't last too long anymore. But not a major issue. THE major issue is my car, which is on its last legs I'm afraid. Under my ownership at least. She needs some major repairs, and I'm just tired of paying for them. I'm ready to set her free and invest in something new. New to me, anyways.
I have a little money saved up, but not enough to get a new car. Just a couple grand. I still don't know about the job next year; I'm pretty sure i's going to happen but the waiting is getting to be a little tough. Especially as time seems to be flying by; the days are getting shorter and so is my calendar. My year with AmeriCorps is supposed to end on January 27th. If the funding doesn't come through by then I don't know what will happen. Potentially I can continue on a month-by month basis at my current position, until the funding does come through (and/or so I would have time to look elsewhere if it turns out that it won't). So at least I'd get the $794.62 continuing on and I could pay rent and bills and maybe buy some cans for dinner. I'm fine with that; the only problem is that it's not enough for a car payment also. That's why I'm hoping to find out about the job before Christmas, so that while I'm home for the holidays I can find a new car and drive back to Rhode Island. That's Plan A. Here's hoping! ¶ 11/28/2006 06:47:00 PM 1 comments
Sunday, November 26, 2006
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
and after a few hours, all is much better. for those keeping score at home. =)
¶ 11/22/2006 08:40:00 PM 0 comments
allow a moment for a 'bitter dance'
So this is my first Thanksgiving away from home. I seem to be taking it worse than I realized I would. Kind of pathetic. Back in the middle of summer I mentioned to Becky and Eric one night while we were at Waterfire that I didn't know if I'd be able to go home for Thanksgiving. Becky invited me to her parents for the holiday (this was before we had started to "see" each other) and I thanked her and considered it and soon accepted it, thinking it wouldn't be too big a deal to stay around up here. My other option was to have bought a cheap flight on Spirit Air and head down to Grand Cayman to visit Gran and Grandaddy for a few days.
Now I wish I would have done that.
Becky and I did sort of part ways on Sunday, but as we were friends before and see each other quite often at church and elsewhere, we're trying to remain friends and cordial about it. I pray this isn't hard for us.
She didn't dis-invite me for tomorrow, so as far as I know I will still be going with her and her family to Connecticut. I'm greatful for the inclusion, really I am...but I will miss not spending the day with family. I missed it this morning as everyone at the office were discussing their plans. I miss it right now, as I sit in my empty house.
I'm feeling so down that I actually went and created a MySpace account. But I'll probably go and delete it. If for no reason other than making me list my relgion as "Christian-other." Man, what does that even mean? Every other belief gets it's own choice, but Christianity is wrapped up with Other. I know it's super-trivial, and lame that Christianity has even been reduced to a label, but it does irk me a little. If only because this to me does not indicate that it is taken very seriously. And of there is one thing that is worthy of being taken serious in our lives, it's our faith. Wherever that lies.
Every Grain of Sand just came on my music; the I-Tunes is on random, but I doubt this is a random occurance.
Argh, I'm in a bad place. I need to go spend some time away from computers, and alone with God. The one place where I'm not alone right now. ¶ 11/22/2006 05:27:00 PM 0 comments
Now I wish I would have done that.
Becky and I did sort of part ways on Sunday, but as we were friends before and see each other quite often at church and elsewhere, we're trying to remain friends and cordial about it. I pray this isn't hard for us.
She didn't dis-invite me for tomorrow, so as far as I know I will still be going with her and her family to Connecticut. I'm greatful for the inclusion, really I am...but I will miss not spending the day with family. I missed it this morning as everyone at the office were discussing their plans. I miss it right now, as I sit in my empty house.
I'm feeling so down that I actually went and created a MySpace account. But I'll probably go and delete it. If for no reason other than making me list my relgion as "Christian-other." Man, what does that even mean? Every other belief gets it's own choice, but Christianity is wrapped up with Other. I know it's super-trivial, and lame that Christianity has even been reduced to a label, but it does irk me a little. If only because this to me does not indicate that it is taken very seriously. And of there is one thing that is worthy of being taken serious in our lives, it's our faith. Wherever that lies.
Every Grain of Sand just came on my music; the I-Tunes is on random, but I doubt this is a random occurance.
Argh, I'm in a bad place. I need to go spend some time away from computers, and alone with God. The one place where I'm not alone right now. ¶ 11/22/2006 05:27:00 PM 0 comments
Monday, November 20, 2006
Sunday, November 19, 2006
thin lines.
late lunch @ texas road house & late dinner @ greggs. growing conversations with becky during the day and with nate late at night.
watching planes trains and autmobiles early in the morning & starting the untouchables midway through the afternoon.
being out among friends & laying in bed alone. ¶ 11/19/2006 10:23:00 PM 0 comments
watching planes trains and autmobiles early in the morning & starting the untouchables midway through the afternoon.
being out among friends & laying in bed alone. ¶ 11/19/2006 10:23:00 PM 0 comments
Friday, November 17, 2006
there's a change in the weather...
I was just sitting around my room just now, waiting for tonight's events to get here, re-reading some chapters from 'Blue Like Jazz' when I got the sudden urge to get up and go shave the hair completely off my face. I hadn't done this in quite awhile--a few months maybe? Since before my trip to Austin back in September.
Well, whatever. I'm bare now. Feels nice. It's been like 60 degrees outside this week. But the leaves are just about all gone from the trees. It gets dark a little after 4 in the afternoon these days. Just a few more weeks and I'll be able to move; doesn't look like the current inhabitant will have his stuff out before 12/1. Decided I'm going to drive home for Christmas. Should be able to get a few weeks off to go back to Texas.
Things are good, organic. Spontaneous. Mundane. Occasionally boring. Solitary. Contemplative. Surrounded. Hushed.
Just listening to an album from a semi-local band I heard last week, Bill Carleton. He said: "When you think there's no one else, you start to limit yourself." ¶ 11/17/2006 06:18:00 PM 0 comments
Well, whatever. I'm bare now. Feels nice. It's been like 60 degrees outside this week. But the leaves are just about all gone from the trees. It gets dark a little after 4 in the afternoon these days. Just a few more weeks and I'll be able to move; doesn't look like the current inhabitant will have his stuff out before 12/1. Decided I'm going to drive home for Christmas. Should be able to get a few weeks off to go back to Texas.
Things are good, organic. Spontaneous. Mundane. Occasionally boring. Solitary. Contemplative. Surrounded. Hushed.
Just listening to an album from a semi-local band I heard last week, Bill Carleton. He said: "When you think there's no one else, you start to limit yourself." ¶ 11/17/2006 06:18:00 PM 0 comments
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Jesus Camp
Just got back from the Avon where I saw the documentary Jesus Camp with Nate, Tom, Jess, and Ricky. I'm still digesting it, so I won't commentary too much. As a Christian, I found myself squirming and unfortunately even chuckling often throughout the hour and a half. However I also found myself to be captivated at the same time, very captivated as I wrestled with trying to understand what was going on in front of me.
Having grown up in the South, in a big suburban landscape attending a mega-church before we knew to call it that, I related with some of what went on. Not the Pentacostal factors (speaking in tongues, preaching "turn or burn" by age 8) as these kids in the movie were, but more the listening to Carman and laughing at...well some of it related to experiences I had growing up. And it kind of upset me. But it has made me appreciate more who I am, who I have been, and how my parents let me figure this out without pressuring me one way or another too strongly. I am American; I am a Christian. But these days I have trouble relating to much of what I saw tonight--on both fronts.
The movie does in some ways feel like a time capsule of a not so distant past (2005) America. It gives us a very isolated feel as well (doesn't help that the camp is located in Devils'a Lake, North Dakota). 2005--the movie circles around the retirement of Justice O'Connor and the appoitment of Justice Alito and some of the Christians in Middle America's reaction to the events. A very scary time for America, in my opinion. A time when I really feared that we might be stuck in Conservative Pro-Bush-Middle-America tailspin and remain there for a very long period. And I lived there at the time, I saw it every day. But I also periodically saw beneath the surface with people I encountered back there, too, and could see days like last Tuesday were not totally gone from America's forecast. I just didn't expect them so soon. Check out Linc Chaffee's (R-RI--I live here now I can call him Linc, until January anyways) Op-Ed in Sunday's NY Times as a coda on these thoughts (registration req'd...it's free!).
Last note, Jesus Camp also features a rather damning cameo from Pastor Ted Haggard. Yikes. Here's their response to accusations he made. Before the accusations made against him emerged. Yikes redux. ¶ 11/12/2006 11:55:00 PM 2 comments
Having grown up in the South, in a big suburban landscape attending a mega-church before we knew to call it that, I related with some of what went on. Not the Pentacostal factors (speaking in tongues, preaching "turn or burn" by age 8) as these kids in the movie were, but more the listening to Carman and laughing at...well some of it related to experiences I had growing up. And it kind of upset me. But it has made me appreciate more who I am, who I have been, and how my parents let me figure this out without pressuring me one way or another too strongly. I am American; I am a Christian. But these days I have trouble relating to much of what I saw tonight--on both fronts.
The movie does in some ways feel like a time capsule of a not so distant past (2005) America. It gives us a very isolated feel as well (doesn't help that the camp is located in Devils'a Lake, North Dakota). 2005--the movie circles around the retirement of Justice O'Connor and the appoitment of Justice Alito and some of the Christians in Middle America's reaction to the events. A very scary time for America, in my opinion. A time when I really feared that we might be stuck in Conservative Pro-Bush-Middle-America tailspin and remain there for a very long period. And I lived there at the time, I saw it every day. But I also periodically saw beneath the surface with people I encountered back there, too, and could see days like last Tuesday were not totally gone from America's forecast. I just didn't expect them so soon. Check out Linc Chaffee's (R-RI--I live here now I can call him Linc, until January anyways) Op-Ed in Sunday's NY Times as a coda on these thoughts (registration req'd...it's free!).
Last note, Jesus Camp also features a rather damning cameo from Pastor Ted Haggard. Yikes. Here's their response to accusations he made. Before the accusations made against him emerged. Yikes redux. ¶ 11/12/2006 11:55:00 PM 2 comments
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
the lunch table
It was me. I did it. I ate that Nutty Bar that was sitting in the fridge at work for the past four months. Sitting there tempting us all for so very long, wondering who had forgot their Little Debbie from some long-gone lunch. And I did it, I stepped up to the plate, marched right over to that old mini fridge, threw open the door and pulled that Nutty Bar out of the frost, from among the abandoned fruit cups and left over creamer, and ripped that open.
And let me tell you something: it was good. Those things do not go bad. I can't emphasize that enough: Little Debbie's scrumptious snacks do not go bad, no matter how long they wait to be eaten in your office (or home) refrigerator. Outside of the fridge, it's all up to you pardners.
Of course, I've been eating Nutty Bars all my life. Growing up Little Debbie was one of our best friends. Although I think no one ate more Nutty Bars than Jeff Hurst. Jeff would always eat at least one--sometimes up to four--Nutty Bars for his lunch. Maybe a bag of chips. But it was those darn Nutty Bars that Jeff always had at the lunch table in junior high & high school. Borrowing money from us to pick up another one from the snack cart.
Wonder what's happened to Jeff? It's getting to where I'm starting to wonder what happened to most people I knew back then. The Holidays are coming up though, and we tend to see old friends and random individuals from our past during those times when we go home. Most all I know still are around the Metroplex, so it should be interesting this year, having been living in RI. In one sense it will be the first time I really will be coming home for the holidays. Actually sort of looking forward to tracking some people down.
Sort of. =) Maybe we can share a few Nutty Bars. I'm buying. ¶ 11/07/2006 09:40:00 PM 0 comments
And let me tell you something: it was good. Those things do not go bad. I can't emphasize that enough: Little Debbie's scrumptious snacks do not go bad, no matter how long they wait to be eaten in your office (or home) refrigerator. Outside of the fridge, it's all up to you pardners.
Of course, I've been eating Nutty Bars all my life. Growing up Little Debbie was one of our best friends. Although I think no one ate more Nutty Bars than Jeff Hurst. Jeff would always eat at least one--sometimes up to four--Nutty Bars for his lunch. Maybe a bag of chips. But it was those darn Nutty Bars that Jeff always had at the lunch table in junior high & high school. Borrowing money from us to pick up another one from the snack cart.
Wonder what's happened to Jeff? It's getting to where I'm starting to wonder what happened to most people I knew back then. The Holidays are coming up though, and we tend to see old friends and random individuals from our past during those times when we go home. Most all I know still are around the Metroplex, so it should be interesting this year, having been living in RI. In one sense it will be the first time I really will be coming home for the holidays. Actually sort of looking forward to tracking some people down.
Sort of. =) Maybe we can share a few Nutty Bars. I'm buying. ¶ 11/07/2006 09:40:00 PM 0 comments
Friday, November 03, 2006
weekend update
I think my roommate is using my bar of soap in the shower. It bugs me, but it's soap so I guess there can't be too much of a transfer of germs. Right? Anyways there's no way to prove it, without putting in a hidden camera. Which would mean moving the camera from his bedroom.
I'm just kidding. But the soap mystery shouldn't last too long, because it looks like I'll be moving this month into an apartment. 3rd story, same neighborhood but an actual apartment. My landlord owns the house and needs a tenant and when we were talking about it I made a quick decision to take him up on it. I'm psyched; it's on the 3rd story of the house, a nice size 2-bedroom, large kitchen and living room. Wood floors, view of downtown, the roommate seems like a stand-up guy also. Same rent also, which rules and was the reason why I can make the switch now instead of waiting until after the new year.
But it does look like the money will come through for a position at VCRI next year doing pandemic flu volunteer training for the RI Department of Health. So yeah, I will be staying around for a while. And it's what is right, there is no doubt in my mind.
Had a great weekend with Mom last week. So great to spend time with her, and we did all the perfect New England Autumn actitvities. Experiencing Fall up here has been beautiful.
It's interesting, with the elections going on next week and all the expectation on either side, one commentary that stood out to me this week came on my lunch break as I was listening to Day to Day on NPR here at the house. They were discussing the impact of 9/11 on my generation--those of us who were aged 19-25 when it occured--and how my peers and I are looking at the world around us. How we overwhelmingly support the UN and are very scared and upset about the way Iraq has made the US look in the world, how we have been stirred to do some sort of community service...including voting. A study from Harvard I believe...and you know I appreciate that. ¶ 11/03/2006 06:28:00 PM 1 comments
I'm just kidding. But the soap mystery shouldn't last too long, because it looks like I'll be moving this month into an apartment. 3rd story, same neighborhood but an actual apartment. My landlord owns the house and needs a tenant and when we were talking about it I made a quick decision to take him up on it. I'm psyched; it's on the 3rd story of the house, a nice size 2-bedroom, large kitchen and living room. Wood floors, view of downtown, the roommate seems like a stand-up guy also. Same rent also, which rules and was the reason why I can make the switch now instead of waiting until after the new year.
But it does look like the money will come through for a position at VCRI next year doing pandemic flu volunteer training for the RI Department of Health. So yeah, I will be staying around for a while. And it's what is right, there is no doubt in my mind.
Had a great weekend with Mom last week. So great to spend time with her, and we did all the perfect New England Autumn actitvities. Experiencing Fall up here has been beautiful.
It's interesting, with the elections going on next week and all the expectation on either side, one commentary that stood out to me this week came on my lunch break as I was listening to Day to Day on NPR here at the house. They were discussing the impact of 9/11 on my generation--those of us who were aged 19-25 when it occured--and how my peers and I are looking at the world around us. How we overwhelmingly support the UN and are very scared and upset about the way Iraq has made the US look in the world, how we have been stirred to do some sort of community service...including voting. A study from Harvard I believe...and you know I appreciate that. ¶ 11/03/2006 06:28:00 PM 1 comments
