The Great Outdoors She's putting on her jacket
the sun sinks early these days
he sits back in the chair
a second glass of wine
a sidewalk table for two
she's a little more relaxed
the laughter sneaks out
he's just in from abroad
she's leaning closer in
he's leaning closer in
sunlight on their faces
for the last time tonight.
He's older, she's professional
in a legal manner
the dinner is early
the suns on her hair
no one in the world but themselves
all hands on the table now.
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September is beautiful. The clouds moving in around this time of night--5 and 6:00 pm--remind me of a winter I spent in Indiana a few years ago. The highlights of my day were the January commutes to and from the office. Not because I was going or coming from work, but because of the way the world looked outside the car windows. Just amazing wispy clouds and muted hues of skyline. We were a little North of Indianapolis, in the suburbs, and something about it all was just striking. I had never experienced a "true" winter before this time in the early days of 2003. I was going through a very melancholy time in life; my parents divorce had just finalized a few months earlier; I was in between colleges with no real direction, and I had accepted an internship taking me further away from home than I had ever been for more than a week. I was listening to a lot of Vince Guaraldi's music from the Peanuts cartoons. A Charlie Brown Christmas, and more specifically George Winston's version of The Great Pumpkin Waltz. It is all very loving and melancholy music, and it was the soundtrack for this period of my life.

I turned some of that music on again last night as I was driving. Not because I was feeling melancholy--far from it, I'm happier in life than I have been in quite a while, what with friends and a nice little job and in the process of building a community around me here in Providence, and all new episodes of Law and Order. But the way it looked outside my window last night as I was driving out to Northern RI for a free dinner (the lengths you'll go when you're on an Americorps budget are amazing...I haven't made a meal for myself in just about a week!) reminded me a lot of those days in Indiana. It can be dangerous, stir up some buried emotions...but maybe that's ok. After all, I've matured a tad since them. Maybe this time around I can handle it a little better.

Also I've been thinking a lot lately about John Candy. Long story as to why, but not sure if one really needs a good reason to be thinking about John Candy, am I right? It says a lot for a legacy when you can make a blanket statement about a deceased actor such as "We all have your favorite John Candy movies." I heard that last week and have been thinking it over. It's a pretty true statement. Just, go with me on this, ok?   ¶ 9/28/2006 05:12:00 PM 0 comments

  his thoughts; my thoughts You need rhino skin
If you're gonna begin
To walk
Through this world
You need elephant balls
If you don't want to crawl
On your hands
Through this world

You need eagles wings
To get over things
That make no sense
In this world

You need rhino skin
If you're gonna pretend
You're not hurt by this world

If you listen long enough
You can hear my skin grow tough-- Tom Petty

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those ain't people behind you son,
they're geese!
and those there ain't storm clouds moving in,
it's autumn!
'cause contrary to popular belief, Fall's origins
weren't with the public school calendar.
blows your mind, doesn't it young Texan?  ¶ 9/23/2006 01:44:00 AM 0 comments

  Last Dance with Mary Jane Aesthetically, I have always loved Austin, Texas. But it's never been home, and much to my chagrin something about it has never quite felt right for me. I guess there's just some places you're not supposed to spend too much time, and Austin could just be one of those places for me. Not in the stars. But that doesn't mean that from time to time I can drop in, have a look around.

So that's what I did over the weekend, for what will probably be the last time for a long while. At least until next years' ACL Fest. Because I'm sold; I'm a fan, and I don't even know where to begin.

We caught Gnarls Barkley on Friday afternoon and then hit up some Thievery Corporation, who were amazing with their featured artisits from all around the world. A rare occurance to hear the sitar and turntables mixed together. Van Morrison finished the night. As he came out and started playing the harmonica, in suit and fedora, and made his way into "Back On Top" everyone around me just stood there and I know we were all thinking the same thing: "Wow. That's Van Morrison."

Saturday Ben Kweller got a nosebleed and did some unmentionable things to try and stop it, although he eventually cut it short after squeezing in "Falling" and bleeding all over the keyboards. The Shins thrilled the crowd, Aimee Mann gave us goosebumps, String Cheese jammed and Explosions in the Sky, well, exploded.
They went on stage around 6:3o in the evening. It had been hot but nothing in comparison to last years' 108. And by this time the sun was beginning to make it's decent behind some clouds and had begun to paint the sky with it's array of Texas sunset colors. I took a few minutes and reclined down onto the grass and just soaked in the feeling. It was a feeling you don't get living in the heart of a city like Providence. It was a true Texas feeling. Texas--the Hill Country--at sunset is not a feeling you ever forget. I can't describe it. I won't try.
There are few things that could have topped that experience, and one was about to occur at the stage behind me. As the sun dissapeared I found myself climbing over people to move as close as I could to the stage for the main event of Saturday night: Willie. Willie did what he does, and he did it amazingly. His guitar playing is like none other. His set list on Saturday included a lot of standards like 'All of Me', 'Blue Skies' and 'Georgia' as well as two really funny new tunes. Age gracefully and with a sense of humor, and continue living life loving every minute. Stay true to yourself. That's the Willie way.

Sunday was another full day. I was there for one reason, the one act that sold me on coming halfway across the country to attend all 3 days of the festival. My favorite artist, headlining the night. But that would come later. At noon when we arrived it began storming and we stood in front of the stage for Anathallo and got drenched and clapped and sang along. What a great start for the show! Later, once the sun was out, Matisyahu hit the stage with his reggae-rap praising God was quite an experience. It takes a strong soul to be a white, NYC-born Hasidic-reggae/rap artist. And it takes an even stronger one to be taken from a small club to be performing songs of praise and adoration in front of a, shall we say, spirited festival crowd.
The Flaming Lips. What can I say? If the women and children dressed as Santa and aliens wasn't enough, there was always the inflatable spaceman and aliens and the fake blood and the confetti. Plus some pretty fun sing-alongs and an amazing accompaniment to the sun sinking for the day behind a massive, UFO-shaped cloud. I am an instant fan.

Some of the gang I was with came and went throughout the day, but I opted to stay put and save our seats for the main event. And finally as darkness set in and all the other acts finished up, it was time. Lightning flased around us, an ominous sign but none of us took the warning. And neither did Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers. Walking out into the darkness they tuned up their instruments and flew right into 'Listen to Her Heart.' We swooned. Petty jammed. He jumped around on stage like he was Benny Goodman, leading the orchestra...I mean audience an unforgettable experience known as 'Learning to Fly.' I can't wait to download the show from I-Tunes when it comes avaliable.

What else about the weekend? Bar-B-Q. Breakfast tacos. So many breakfast tacos. Crashed at Seaberg's new place, saw his new car, new office, new life. That was good times. Didn't really see Sherry too much, or anyone else for that matter. Had some time to think though, which is usually worthwhile. Read Dylan's memoir on the plane. Continued my study of The Book of Acts throughout the weekend. Saw the spectacular Detroit Airport, and the not so thrilling Cleveland one. In a way this kind of served as my Summer vacation, and for the most part it was a success. For the most part.

Oh, Austin.
No I don't suppose I'll ever live there. I missed my chance for that dance, and it's ok, because it's not what was planned for me. So here I am in Rhode Island, building my life; halfway across the country from Austin (I got a USA map in my National Geographic yesterday at the airport!). Still, when it comes to the end of the day, there really is nothing quite like it...
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Hey, the leaves are turning up here. Fall is creeping in daily and it's starting to gently rain outside my window. School is back in session, the city's buzzing with life. Autumn is officially here starting Saturday. I'm so excited!  ¶ 9/19/2006 06:40:00 PM 0 comments

  if you don't run, you rust Can't help but watch the cable news tonight. I firmly believe that these talking head shows on cable are one of the major, major problems of our modern society and I try to personally avoid them at all costs. But it's kind of exciting on election night.
Polls just closed here in RI for this Primary Day. It's been rough these past few weeks with all the campaign ads. RI politics are fascinating. I think I picked a pretty good year to be here, Buddy Cianci or not.

It's turning out to be a pretty long week, and it's only Tuesday. But guess what happens on Thursday? A big weekend. Spending some time with Chris, Sherry, Van, Willie, Tom...
I cain't wait.  ¶ 9/12/2006 09:15:00 PM 2 comments

  sinking (in) Yesterday, Yours Truly was responsible for leading a training for most of the VISTA's in Rhode Island. We had a group of about 35, plus the Emergency Manager for Pawtucket. I led them through a Volunteer Reception Center training (essentially training staff to run a reception center for the spontaneous volunteers that show up in the aftermath of a large-scale disaster).
It was my first time, and I'm being hard on myself in the critiques although the concensus is that I did a good job, which is nice. I did have some issues with the Power Point (a last minute addition safety crutch) but I do believe the point was made, the group was educated, and so that is the true measure of success.

Some of the VISTA's I knew and are on their last few months of service; many of them were new to their assignments and some even to Rhode Island. Like I guess most VISTA groups there is a fair amount of diversity in age ane ethnicity and background. At the training I picked up a nice, new glossy brochure book that AmeriCorps had put out (rather than, say devoting any extra $ to increasing our stipend!) explaining the history of VISTA's and illustrating some of the impact VISTA's have had through the years. Reading it this afternoon at work actually sort of put into perspective some of what I have accomplished this year. Living in Providence it has been a little different than, say, rural Montata. And I have been doing a lot of sitting in an office wrking behind the scenes towards education, but even in seven months progress really has been made, maybe even an impact or two has been made. Maybe. Even if not, recognizing the progress is a pretty neat feeling. (Yes, I said it: Neat.)

Still working on trying and figure out what's next for me. I still think I need some time before starting back to school, so that's out of the question for now. Another year of service seems to be building in possibility. Maybe even here in Rhode Island, who knows? Unfortunately one of the largest detractors is the money factor. I hate that, so much. That it takes more money to survive, and especially don't really like the fact that I want more money. But $770/month is getting kind of old really fast. That amount does not go too far in this 'big Eastern city.'

So I don't know, man. I certainly already have a few possibilities up here, including another year as a VISTA working at the State. But maybe I can swing a gig as a VISTA leader. A couple extra hundred a month sure would be a nice incentive for another year of service. Does that sound bad?  ¶ 9/07/2006 04:34:00 PM 1 comments

    ¶ 9/02/2006 08:58:00 PM 0 comments